Gunner Jonathan "La-De-Dah" "Paderewski" Graham is the concert party's pianist. His appearance – bald and bespectacled – marks him out as a stereotypical boffin. He has a university degree in English literature and is very clever, speaking with a very upper class accent. This is why the Sergeant Major always mockingly repeats what he says, as well as mockingly addressing him as Mister La-De-Dah Gunner Graham. Graham often has difficult and ingenious plans to solve the concert party's problems, but these plans never seem to work and often result in his saying "oh well, bang goes that theory". The others (even the Sergeant Major and the Officers) often rely on his intelligence to get them out of awkward situations.